Cynfelin

 

The University of Wales has just had a clean bill of health and confidence report from the QAA. Colleges across the country would like these results, so why are they being hounded?

Our information is that Leighton Andrews has never met with the University of Wales, why not?

Why is the BBC gunning for the University of Wales?

The University of Wales is only doing what all other educational establishments across the country are doing.  It was set up under the watch of other universities who are now ‘rubbing their hands with glee’ as they watch the fallout, why?

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The Romanian News Agency (Romag) reports

Observers report that the Romanian Politician of the Year ceremony in central Bucharest ended with a ‘Ceausescu Moment’ when the crowd failed to respond at all when it was announced that Nicolae Howelescu had been awarded a ‘Lifetime Achievement’ award. “For the first time ever at this event there was no standing ovation’” said Romania’s leading political expert Daran Hiliescu: “It reflects the loathing the people feel for totalitarian tyrants like this. When leading dissident Wig Li received the honour the applause went on for hours!”

Howelescu’s Securitate bodyguard had to bundle the disgraced politician onto the roof of the building to a waiting helicopter with his indignant wife Elena screaming insults at the ungrateful masses, who whistled and cat-called. The helicopter is believed to have landed somewhere in the socialist ‘Little Moscow’ area of the Rhondda Valley, where Howelescu and his wife were bundled into the boot of a white Fiat Uno before being driven off to an unknown destination. Teams of Liberation Army partisans with dogs and searchlights are reported to be hunting him down tonight.

An adoring Elena looks on as her husband’s honour is announced in Bucharest’s Palace of the People.

As the organisers look forward to next year’s event, local Bucharest lobbying company Pozitjv Politjkz has agreed to sponsor hundreds of airline-style sick bags to be placed on each table as an emergency measure amid gossip that Rosa Kleb-lookalike Madame Kinnock, hated wife of the disgraced former Workers’ Commissar, is the running for a Lifetime Achievement award. The rumour given some credence by the fact that workmen have been seen painting a large H surrounded by a white circle on the roof of Bucharest’s Palace of the People. Said a frustrated Daran Hiliescu last night “Any suggestion that this woman could come near to being presented with this award would bring the whole event into disrepute and Romania would become the laughing-stock of the political world.”

Madame Kleb was unavailable for comment last night.

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Now #WikiLeeks, Wales’s own whistleblower website, targets Assembly politicians with astonishing revelations!

Truly shocking revelations from secret files intercepted by #WikiLeeks sympathisers mean that Welsh politics will never be the same again!

WikiLeeks

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Official North Korean News Agency reports:

The were astonishing scenes at this year’s North Korean Politician of the Year Award at Pyongyang City Hall on Tuesday as ailing Valleys’ Supreme Leader Kim Il Mun was awarded the coveted Lifetime Achievement Award. The team of judges, De Nis Bal and Som – reached an unanimous decision to honour the man hailed in his own mind as nothing short of divine.

The assembled crowd of admirers wept openly as the customary eulogy was given by Mer Fin Jons, supremo of the national broadcasting conglomerate. In an openly sycophantic outpouring of praise, a tearful Mer extolled Kim’s countless virtues, prostrating himself on the stage at regular intervals during the four-hour speech as he recalled, repeatedly, for the benefit of those at the back of the gargantuan People’s Palace, how Kim had graciously promoted him to the exalted position of Commissar of the North Korean Broadcasting Corporation (NKBC) and Minister for Propaganda and Public Enlightenment.

Mer went on to recall how he had enjoyed many a climb as Kim’s sherpa and guide on the North Face of the Holy Mountain of Sno-Don, the country’s most sacred peak when the Great Leader had been able to tear himself away from his duties maintaining world peace as chairperson of the UN Security Council.

Mer Fin and Kim Sno-Don

Pictured: Commissar Mer Fin with Great Leader Kim planning climb of Holy Mountain of Sno-Don

As the Commissar’s speech drew to a close, the stage was engulfed as wave upon wave of weeping admirers surged forward to offer their congratulations to the Great Leader. An ugly riot was prevented by the timely intervention of the elite People’s Guard who fired repeatedly over the heads of the crowd. Few fatalities were reported. Calm was finally restored and Kim Il Mun was able to receive the customary standing ovation, which continued for a record 49 minutes and thirty seconds – new record.

Kim's Cardiff Memorial

It was announced that Kim is to be honoured with a 20-times lifestyle bronze statue to be erected in the Square of the Half-starved Serfs in central Pyongyang.

Pyongyang
South Glamorgan
Dateline: Wednesday

The Two Kims1

Kim shows Kim the Great Leap into the Dark.

Wikileeks reports:

WikiLeeks“It was all orchestrated by the dreaded secret police, the Hed Lu,” said leading dissident and pro-democracy campaigner Dae Kwm Skwt. “There was no standing ovation at all; in fact many, including influential Pyongyang dissident Roy Jay Tho Mas walked out in disgust.”

Indeed, Kim is known for his opposition to granting increased powers to the subjugated Cym Ry minority, conquered and annexed several hundred years ago. Despite centuries of oppression and the almost total exploitation of their natural resources the Cym Ry have never lost their identity or their dream of one day becoming a free nation once again.

“It’s ironic that Kim is actually one of the Cym Ry,” Dae added, “He started out as a firebrand socialist but has now joined the gang of imperialists and power-hungry fascist tycoons in the capital. Kim advocates centralised state authority and the brutal oppression of any nationalist or secessionist dissidence.”

“As with so many similar situations Cym Ru is the most deprived and economically inactive area of this divided and failing state.”

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Curse of Kinnock‘KINNOCK BACKS ED!’ scream the headlines. A sense of déja vu? A vague frisson of ‘we’ve been there before’? Well, of course, we have. Remember the Screwloose fiasco just a few months ago and the pathetic hissy fit by Huw Lewis and his whingeing acolytes before poor old Screwers was soundly thrashed by Carwyn Jones in the Welsh Liebour leadership elections? Well, you will also remember that we wrote in Cambriapolitico at the time that one of the chief contributory factors to Screwloose’s defeat, something which sounds like an eerie echo from the tomb of 1980s politics – was The Kinnocchio Factor.

Almost certain demise of Ed’s quest

Yes it’s here again, but then you can’t keep a good windbag in a state of deflation for long. He just can’t help putting in his twopennyworth. The self-important magniloquent Baron of Bedwellty, replete with the usual pseudo-avuncular bombast and flimflammery is at it again, thereby ensuring the almost certain demise of Ed Miliband’s Labour leadership quest. Which prompts the question: is Kinnock actually a closet supporter of brother Dave?

Graham Henry (Eh?!) of the dear old Western Mail (God bless it, as we must now say) commented: “Lord Kinnock’s backing for Ed is a setback for his brother, former Foreign Secretary David” which reveals a huge and staggering dollop of political naiveté given the Baron’s miserable record. Certainly such a comment wouldn’t have come from the pen of saintly, national treasure, Martin Shipton – one of the few commentators at the WM with real political nous.

Kinnock intervention nail in coffin of Ed’s dream

As anyone in Wales with any political intelligence will have gathered, Kinnock’s unwelcome intervention is actually a serious nail in the coffin of Ed’s dreams, and one hell of a boost for his lugubrious brother David and the bouncy little Mr Balls.

It seems that a huge majority of WM readers would agree. The WM’s online ‘Quick Vote’ box posed the question “Will Neil Kinnock’s backing help Ed Miliband to become Labour leader?” A spindly 15.28% said ‘Yes’, while a vigorous and informed 85.72% voted a resounding ‘NO’!

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[IMPORTANT LEGAL NOTE: The terms ‘Screwloose’, ‘Screwers’ and other jocular and whimsical terms or epithets in this article are employed in a purely satirical sense and make no personal implications / insinuations / aspersions / assertions etc as to the mental condition, intelligence, personal propriety, morals, religious inclinations of any persons alive or dead etc etc etc……..]

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LieBour troughers

Choose a Welsh MP avatar and play Fantasy Expenses.

1st Prize:
Visit Afghanistan front line with  Gordon Brown

2nd Prize:
Get a billion £ line of credit from Alastair Darling

3rd Prize:
Choose a duckhouse, bell tower or other item from the John Lewis catalogue

4th Prize:
Learn the art of property  ‘flipping’  from Stephen Crabb (Preseli). A personalised course.

——————————————–

Each Avatar (see below) comes with a list of expenses tools to help you play the game ‘within the rules’.

Andrews, Piggy (Do Ron Rhondda)
15 gallons swill £15
Tail curling tongs £1.50
Cooling mud, 5 sacks £30
Tamiflu, 4 shots £250
Specialist consultancy related to potential charisma bypass, 5 sessions,
£23,560

Vain, Rt Hon., Mister (Neath)
25 gallons “Tangerine Tinge” non-streak self-tanning mousse £85
365 hour sessions “Rentasun” Tanning Parlour, Neath High Street £4,578
Set of 2 “Big Man” heightening implants for shoes £2.65
4 tubs, “Pure Vanity” hair styling paste £90
8 Gallons Christian Dior “Eau Sauvain” eau de toilette £35,549

Davies, Alun “Dredd” (Hopeless South-east)
1 year’s supply “Alive Alive Oh” wake up pills £380
1 year’s supply “Nite Nite” sleeping tablets £462
5 consultancy sessions, “New Man” plastic surgery clinic Los Angeles (“Face
Transplants ŒR’ Us”). £16,945

Murphy, Rt Honest Spudface (Torvain)
Nuclear powered boiling system for third/fourth (Subs: check this) home
£26,468,324
Gold-plated swimming pool £1,256,984
Sedan chair (shared with all other Liebour MPs, AMs etc) £677
Rent of minions, footmen, flunkies etc £41,953

Touhig, Big Don (Swyndlin)
Stop this -That’s enough silly expenses. Site administrator

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Huw LewisJust when it all appeared to be going swimmingly well for ultra-left, ultra-unionist devo-sceptic Labour leadership candidate Huw ‘Screwloose’ Lewis – suddenly it’s all gone pear-shaped.

Over the last few weeks in the gripping battle to succeed Rhodri Morgan as First minister of Wales, it appeared that rank outsider Screwloose, despite having more chips on his shoulders than Harry Ramsdens on a Saturday night, might yet slip under the radar and bring the contest to a tight finish.

Obvious favourite Carwyn Jones, a patriotic Welshman and the only contender with enough gravitas to lead a political party, wimped out on the burning issue facing Wales: increased powers for the Assembly – apparently terrified of being labelled a closet nationalist. Meanwhile statuesque valkyrie Edwina Hart’s campaign ran messily into the mud with an unnecessary and unwise spat over the future of Faith Schools.

No mention of anything remotely anti-Welsh, rabidly unionist or loony-left. Suddenly Screwloose seemed to be a contender. The former chemistry teacher’s 5-minute interview on Thursday’s AM/PM programme actually gave the impression of a reasonable, softly-spoken family man and with no mention of anything remotely anti-Welsh, rabidly unionist or loony-left as might have been expected. When considered against the lacklustre efforts of Edwina and Carwyn on the same programme, you’d have fancied his chances.

But then came the headline…

KINNOCKS THROW WEIGHT BEHIND HUW LEWIS’ VISION FOR WALES!

and the dream is all but over.

Political clowns

The very idea of this Wales-hating duo of political clowns and abject failures (Kinnock as Labour leader, Glenys as a globetrotting ‘Welsh’ MEP who failed to champion one single local issue, and latterly as a disastrously bad Foreign Office minister) giving a boost to anyone in this contest is as laughable as it is pathetic. Here is a couple whose loathing of Wales, its people, language, culture and history (Kinnock is on record as saying that that Wales didn’t have any) is matched only by an obscene greed for wealth and gargantuan appetite for adulation (see Cambriapolitico passim). Lewis simpered that he was “honoured and humbled to have the backing of two such great party figures”, adding bizarrely that Kinnock was somehow responsible for having “saved the party from electoral extinction”, when the exact opposite was the case. He famously and disastrously lost Labour an election condemning it to years in the wilderness until Tony Blair recreated it along Tory lines in the lead up to the New Labour victory of 1997.

Champagne-swilling freeloaders

The very idea of the avowed socialist AM for Merthyr Tydfil – who lives with his AM wife in comfortable middle-class style in the leafy avenues of smart, upmarket Penarth (he claims his “passion is to rid Wales of the curse of child poverty”) – being endorsed by a duo of champagne-swilling multi-millionaire freeloaders and political dinosaurs, is one step too far.

Let’s hope what remains of the Labour Party in Wales has the sense to see straight through this grotesque charade.

By Cynfelyn

Editor’s Note

Wales gives notice to Liebour’s Stalinist bullies – we will not be silenced!

After due consideration by Cambriapolitico’s legal counsel, we feel that the people of Wales have the right to read, in full, our contributor Cynfelyn’s article which has induced such a hissy-fit in Huw Lewis’s highly-strung henchmen Matt Greenough and Luke Holland.

The idiotic idea that reminding readers of Huw Lewis’s nickname “Screwloose” – it’s been applied to him in political circles in Cardiff Bay for some considerable time – and, DOH!, it’s also er… a play on his name, is in anyway a comment on his mental health, should send those who thought it up scrambling onto the couch of their own therapists in Cathedral Road.

The whole silly exercise shows how running scared Liebour’s lost legions
are, and that’s what’s made them so pathetically – and babyishly – touchy.

As we have said – be warned – this is a foretaste of the sort of intimidatory regime a Huw Lewis Liebour leadership will mean.

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News that plans for the Murder Academy at St Athan are in serious jeopardy will lift the hearts of Welsh patriots. The Sunday Times reports that the whole project is threatened as the contractor Metrix, which is lead by the ‘defence group’ Qinetiq, is struggling to get the £1.3 billion from the banks needed to keep the project afloat.

A New Liebour pipe dream built on lies and half-truths.

Those of us who have been following developments over the last couple of years with mounting disgust will hope that this signals the beginning of the end for this ill-conceived and sinister knavery, largely peddled by Labour Vale of Glamorgan MP John Smith. Smith, a faceless New Liebour fellow traveller, will be defending a slim majority of just 1808 at the next general election, has high hopes that the project might just save his skin. It was Smith, you will remember, who once gushed about Barry experiencing a 21st century Welsh rerun of the Californian Gold Rush, with 5,000 new jobs, and a spanking new ‘centre of excellence’ infrastructure bringing as yet undreamed of benefits to the whole of South Wales. It is turning out to be just another New Liebour pipe dream built on lies and half-truths. And thank goodness it is.

Anyone with any sense knows that any ‘Defence Training Academy’ worth its salt would need a huge influx of highly qualified specialist personnel into the area, and that means around 4,500 of the new jobs. Such an invasion would bring with it all the unsavoury curses of a large-scale military presence with vastly increased traffic and construction, not forgetting the inevitable increase in violence and drunken behaviour and resulting local resentment. Any jobs left over for locals would be those of the order of cleaners, security personnel, ancillary labour, cooks and bottle-washers.

We’ve seen it all before. Remember the sweeteners to attract valuable inward investment by the old WDA? Remember the jobs-for-the-boys of the 1980s and 90s, the reneged deals, the red faces, the desolate, unoccupied state-of-the-art ‘facilities’?

Another idiotic splurge of public money

A recent idiotic splurge of public money, incidentally, was right there at St Athan with the much vaunted “Project Red Dragon” – an aeronautical ‘super hangar’ maintenance centre. Back in 2003, this promised us the creation of, 3,300 jobs and a lot more besides because the new facility was to open its doors to commercial aviation concerns. Ribbons were cut, red carpets laid, champagne sprayed, and First Minister Rhodri Morgan promised the inevitable ‘bright new future’ from the regulation bright new ‘centre of excellence’. Within a year the project was on the rocks with a loss of 550 already existing jobs – the result of sensible rationalisation and a more realistic bid by the RAF.

You’d have thought we’d have seen this one coming then? No, Liebour just can’t help it.

The Sunday Times article continues: “Ministers have insisted that the troubled programme to centralise the military’s specialised engineering and technical training at St Athan in South Wales is back on track and would be signed before MPs’ summer recess.”

“But officials revealed that the deal would not now be signed off before the recess, with the possibility that contractor Metrix, led by defence group Qinetiq, “could walk away”. The memo admits that the “currently planned programme will be hard to achieve” and the implementation team is “conducting fall-back planning”.

“The state has provided another £44m to keep the project going, a sum recently confirmed in a parliamentary minute. The government came under fire this year when it emerged that it had already provided “contingent liability” funding of about £50m.”

‘Fall-back planning’? Sound idea – as long as all the bills, the sweeteners, the perks and the pensions are settled first of course – all from a total that’s not far off £100 million of public money.

Afghan adventure costs Wales £127,000,000 a year

In the light of the current financial crisis, a government defence spending review is now looking seriously at Britain’s Trident programme – the true cost of which, including the purchase of new missiles, the replacement of existing nuclear submarines and the overall costs of maintaining the entire system for 30 years was, in 2006, estimated at £76 billion. It is significantly greater today.

The government is also re-examining the construction of two vast 65,000 ton super aircraft carriers, the original budget for which has risen by a quarter to £5 billion (from an original £3.9 billion). In view of the obvious and urgent need to cut public expenditure, why on earth is Britain still trying to punch so far above its weight when it patently can’t afford it? Why is Britain still sending a foreign aid package of £825 million to India, a nuclear power with its own space research programme and one of the fastest-growing economies of the world? Why is Britain pursuing a winless war in Afghanistan with troops issued with inferior equipment which is patently not fit for purpose, at an annual cost to the British taxpayer of more than £2.5 billion – that’s a cost, incidentally, to Welsh taxpayers of a staggering £127,000,000 a year. Think also of the terrible, criminal loss of life Liebour’s ill-conceived adventures in Iraq and Afghanistan have brought about, and there’s no sign of the latter ending any time soon.

No! to saving John Smith’s parliamentary career

Commenting on the latest developments Mark Pritchard, Conservative MP for The Wrekin in Shropshire, a fierce opponent of the scheme, whose own constituency has a location and facilities which provide a far more feasible and cost-effective option said: “With further delays and escalating costs, no more public money should be allocated to the programme until its viability has been fully considered.” You’ve said it!

Angharad Mair asked recently “Is this the kind of development we really need or want here in Wales?” adding that the St Athan military academy would “be the military centre for the whole of the UK, and that could bring dire consequences to Wales, as well as turning a beautiful and peaceful part of our country into what would have to be a security-obsessed nightmare. In Wales we have a long and proud tradition of peace and pacifism, and that should be enough reason to condemn this horrific development.”

Indeed, the building of Murder Academies in Wales has an ignominious history. In September 1936 a ’Bombing School’ set up to train RAF pilots in the arts of aerial bombardment was burnt down by a group of Welsh patriots, Saunders Lewis, D.J. Williams and Lewis Valentine, outraged at the desecration of one of the most beautiful parts of Gwynedd. As with St Athan, there were perfectly good alternative sites in England, one in Dorset and the other in Northumberland. Both had been rejected after protests by local historians and naturalists. Wales, then as now, was singled out for the privilege.

The answer to the Murder Academy must be NO on every count:

NO to saving John Smith’s lacklustre parliamentary career, NO to disrupting and overwhelming the communities of South Wales and the outstandingly beautiful Vale of Glamorgan, NO to squandering further taxpayers’ money, NO to swelling the coffers of unscrupulous and sinister ‘defence’ consortia – and most important of all, NO to creating a monstrous colonial leviathan which will serve to bind a steadily devolving Wales to a rapidly failing England with titanic bands of armoured steel.

Sources:

http://business.timesonline.co.uk/tol/business/industry_sectors/public_sector/article6638748.ece

http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2006/sep/21/military.armstrade

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